‘Waiting to Drive’

23:04 Tue 17 Jul 2007
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She didn’t like waiting. She knew it was better for her to be in the car, but it still irked her.

She wanted a cigarette. Ralph had taken them. She was supposed to be quitting. She drummed her fingers on the wheel, watching the rain. Thirty-six years old, and this is what she was doing with herself. Watching the rain, waiting to see if a dumb plan would come off.

Sometime soon, Ralph was supposed to come running out, carrying a lot of money. She’d drive them away. She knew the route, knew her part of the plan. Pretty easy. Even if there were complications, it was just driving. She liked to drive. Even in the rain.

Would it work? Could be. She doubted it. She didn’t think much of Ralph, when it came down to it. There was a large chance he’d fuck it up.

She realized she didn’t much care. If he didn’t make it, she might be upset, but she’d also be relieved. It wasn’t going anywhere, she knew that, and she’d be free without having to go through the usual crap. So there’d be short term pain, but in the long term it didn’t matter much. If it worked, there’d be money. That might be good for a while, but in the long term it didn’t matter. She knew they’d go through it fast enough, and be back in the same place.

If he came back without any money, that would be a relief in a different way. The relief of not having to deal with change, the comfort of the familiar. She leaned to the back seat to pat her jacket pockets for cigarettes, but there weren’t any.

Through the rain, she heard gunshots. It might be time to go soon. She started the engine.

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